Dominant Body Language – Intonation
Last time I said that speaking loud would show dominance. There is another way to do that with your voice: the intonation.
There are two intonation that I want to look at:
Powerful Intonation
Imagine a bouncer in front of a club who checks the age of the party people. For a specific party he only grants entry to 25 year olds or older. If he thinks someone is older then he doesn’t even check. If someone looks young he asks: “how old are you?”
The bouncer feels superior to the people and he doesn’t care if they like him or not. He’s just doing his job.
This attitude shows in his voice. The question he asks sounds more like an order to show the ID.
If you look at the melody of his question the voice gets lower at the end.
Weak Intonation
Imagine a fan who meets his idol and is asking: “Can I take a picture with you?” The fan feels inferior. Therefore he is cautious and he would like the idol to like him.
If you look at the melody of the fan’s question the voice gets higher at the end.
Check out these two examples of intonations.
Intonation with Women
So how should you talk to women to show power and dominance?
With the powerful intonation of the bouncer.
If a man talks to a woman like this or asks her questions like this she instantly feels his power. She feels his indifference. If she answers the question she qualifies herself to him. She accepts his dominant position.
Of course there is not only the powerful and the weak intonation. It’s not black and white. Everything in between also exists. And of course also more extremes than what I did.
The point of this article is to notice that you can use your intonation to change the meaning of your questions and statements. You can set the frame of the interaction by using your intonation.
Right now I’m experimenting with this idea and observe how people react to my volume and intonation. And also I’m observing how other people use their voice.
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